Made from our custom blend of fabric, designed solely for our apha’s – we would like to introduce our onyx tee. We have ensured the perfect fit with this tee, made to highlight all your best features. Think of it as our classic tee v2.0 but with a heavier cooling material.
That means each of 'em will need their own witty blurb, and well, that's really way more than we'd like to write.
So, we're doing what any motivated slacker (talk about paradoxes) would've done and figuring out the easiest route to keeping everyone happy.
We're effectively combining the excitement of writing words with just sitting here.
Is it working?
We'll take that as a yes.